But that is not what I wish to speak of today. Today I want to talk about something else, but what? I just watched all three Lord of the Rings movies and each time they move me in different ways, dependent I guess on my feelings at the time of viewing. This time the hope of all the characters moved me as did their bravery. Tolkien was a visionary (if a bit dry) and a lover of nature (duh) and a hater of the industrial revolution (a second duh) and I cannot fault that. I look around these days and am slightly disgusted by the computer/cell phone/ipads/tablets that seem to have taken over our world. We are a purely digital world and human contact seems to have flown out the window.
Now, do not think that by saying the above that I do not see the irony of someone blogging on a computer about how annoying computers are. I love them in their own way and for the way they keep us in touch but I also hate them for the way they keep us in touch. Some days I turn off my phone for the whole day just so that I can be at peace and let me tell ya, its glorious.
I have forgotten my point here in my mini-rant...oh yes, I didn't really have one so I shall now discuss Nature. Yep, good ole nature, the outdoors, bugs, dirt, spiders (shudder) and all that "goodness" (those that know me know I am being sarcastic slightly). As much as I find being hot and covered in bugs unlikeable I do love nature. I love sitting outside while a breeze dries the sweat on my face and the birds sing their songs. I love standing outside on a clear night and seeing the stars and feeling so tiny it is almost painful. I love sitting by the ocean, watching the endless tides roll in and out. It stirs some old humanity in me that I have forgotten. It makes me wish for a different time when all the jobs I am qualified for weren't computer-centric. It makes me wish my life had taken a different path to where I could be outside. It makes me wish I were a little bit braver.
But I am afraid like the rest of us. I took this step into the unknown thinking someone or some job would catch me right away. That didn't happen and here I sit, day after day, searching for jobs. Getting responses that are 60% scams, 20% crappy jobs I would never want to do and 20% legitmate jobs that don't want me after I interview. It bruises the soul and makes me wish I had never given my notice.
But there is that other part of me that is so ETERNALLY GRATEFUL that I quit. I am so grateful to be out of that world and onto something else...something possibly more exciting.
Uh oh...here I go talking about my unemployment again! I'm so self-centered. I apologize my dear (and few) readers. It seems I cannot start on any path that does not seem to lead to what my life is like right now. Once again my apologies. It cannot be helped and since this is my blog I guess I'll write what I dang well please! (but don't think I don't appreciate you reading it. Thank you!)
As a wise hobbit once said, "It's a dangerous business, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no telling where you might be swept off to." So I stepped out the door of what I knew and am trying to keep my feet until I find my way. Its tiring, its stressful and it's kind of fun.
Yeah, I'm waxing poetical. Again, it's my blog, I'll do what I please. Thank you very much.
Anyway, this post today is meandering into the incomprehensible and perhaps pointless so let me say one last thing. What I want to get across is four things:
1. Don't be afraid to jump into nothing
2. Do your best to enjoy the down time (I'm working on this one)
3. Do not take candy from strangers, unless it's skittles. Never be afraid to taste the rainbow.
4. Find a nice hobbit hole to live in and stay there for life. Seriously, where can I find one of these? If I ever become a rich, successful writer, I am so building a hobbit hole.
Love, Light and Donut holes.
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